Sunday 28 November 2010

Snow Show

Has anybody actually got any snow out there, or are THEY just threatening it for something to talk about. I'm bored of it (yes Mother 'bored OF it' ha ha haa) already and we haven't had any yet. Apart from that bit that's just suddenly started flittering past the window - DAMN. I'm in a grumpy enough mood simply being cold and surrounded by children who think I'm interested in juggling and dinosuar contortionism.

Explanation of latest grump: cold, can't get on with the things I want to get on with, can't be bothered to get on with the things that I have to get on with, too many things that I want/have to to get on with, no energy, no gumption, no interest.... and another sore lip. To sum up: miserable git.

And I've drunk my coffee which means that I'm supposed to switch off now and go and 'do'.


But I keep getting distracted by hopeful little moppets squeaking about snowflakes.

Eughhh I hate bloody snow.


Then again....if it snowed, then I would have the perfect escape hatch from doing things. We'd be trapped in again and therefore excused from outside life. Not excused from inside life however, but it would still slow down - like driving past a road accident - to look through the windows alot and tut.

But...... we're out of biscuits. And proper coffee. So all in all it had better not bloody snow. Plus I am waiting for an appointment for some consultant type to peer up my lady bits. Probably best to get that out the way sooner rather than... But if it snowed I wouldn't be able to go. And I don't want to go. Not that they've made the appointment yet. Somebody rang me to ask if I could do Monday. Too much to reorganise so I asked what about Tuesday. 'I'm just booking Monday now' 'And you can't move on to Tuesday until you've filled up Monday?' 'Yes' ............. I'm assuming she never did fill every slot on Monday as I haven't heard back. Suppose I'll have to wait until Monday actually passes by and wait for the next appointment I can't meet to be offered. Don't you just adore medical administration? Even more useless than educational administration. Third in line are shoe shops who can't order in a non-shopsoiled pair of something until they've sold the unsaleable ones 'cos Head Office says so. Are office workers marked at birth? Worker ant, soldier ant, worker ant, soldier ant, unimaginative blinkered box-ticker with no communication skills? Yes, administration for you. Next! Taking that further..... what the bloody 'ell did I look like as a baby? Life of unachievement and chaos for this one. Hmmmnnnn - art college. That should bugger it up for the rest of its life. Aspiration with no talent - perfect. Next!

Maybe up in Cloudland the Snow Monkeys are waiting for all the forms to be completed and triple checked by Head Office before they're authorised to drop a flake. They're probably waiting for my appointment to be set. So I don't reckon it's ever going to snow.

For now, I've drunk my coffee (instant but I can't really tell the difference) so I'd better go and DO something. I can hardly contain my enthusiasm. Next job, the bogey hankie mountain.

.....Trudging through a Winter Wonderland.......

6 comments:

  1. We have an inch, but my mother has 12 inches and apparently that's just too many to accommodate!

    I read a fascinating article in the Sunday Times today about lady bits - you can go to spas to have 'facials', or rather vajacials, where they give it a rub and exfoliate it. There's also a website called ilovemymuff.com where you can buy lots of lotions for it. It would look lovely for your forthcoming appointment.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well got a pathetic sprinkling here. Am hoping for dredges and dredges of the stuff so that we get snowed in and I can exist on junk food from the corner shop rather than the frugal veg box of weird indedible lumpy things that gets delivered once a week.

    Know what you mean about medical admin. Around here they have to give everyone an appt within 48 hours or something. But they interpret that to mean that you can't book ahead to have an appt AFTER 48 hrs!!! So on the morning of the 48hr lucky appt lottery, it's like trying to phone up a permanently engaged call centre. And obviously haven't factored in the concept of needing to organise childcare IN ADVANCE. But then of course they're service providers and we are irritations otherwise known as customers...and...I'll...stop ranting now.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Well I never! I'm gonna check out ilovemymuff.com straight away - ( I wonder if it's got anything to do with Mrs NotWavingButIroning? Be a laugh either way.) Thank you for that! I'm sure they will agree that 12" is indeed too much.

    Yes - actually having a LIFE which includes CHILDREN and PLACES TO BE and OTHER PEOPLE TO NOT LET DOWN etc etc etc - such an annoyance to The System. Wish I'd just said 'yes' to the first offer now, put plugs in my ears to all the protest and driven off fast.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Don't knock it till you've tried it. We're holed up in here with school cancelled. Guilt-free DVDs on loop and doing diddly, slowly, wearing lots of clothes. Best thing is the silence, specially at night when the street lights turn the ground and sky eery, muffled orange. But then I've got milk in the fridge, spare jar of coffee, no appointments and beaucoup Merlot so it's pretty much nirvana.
    Hope the cold eases...

    ReplyDelete
  5. ehmummy - that half sounds like what we do every day here......minus the silence bit.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yeah silence!!! That sounds interesting!!!

    Meanwhile - oops. Snowed in now good and proper.

    ReplyDelete